“Women, Caregiving & Dogs”

As women, we’re brought up to be the caregivers. Yes, we live in an age where women supposedly have more choices, but the truth runs deeper. We carry generations of female history within us — generations that taught us to notice, to nurture, and to ensure that everyone’s needs are met.

We’re experts at reading the subtle cues of those we love. Any woman who has ever cared for someone — whether a family member, a partner, or a baby — knows that inner knowing, that instinct that seems to whisper what they need before they even realise it themselves.

And when something slips through the cracks, when we miss a sign or a need, we’re often the first to criticise ourselves for not caring enough!

So when we bring a dog into the family, we naturally extend that same nurturing energy. With young puppies, that sensitivity can be a real gift — it helps them feel safe, understood, and loved.

Lulu & Bear

I was just like that. I am one of those women. And it’s that very quality that makes me good at what I do — because I understand, deeply, how we as women respond emotionally to the dogs we share our lives with.

But over the years, I’ve learned to manage those emotional responses. And one of the most extraordinary lessons dogs have taught me is this: they are not human.

Dogs don’t have the same emotional needs as we do. In fact, dogs are more like women than we might imagine — they, too, want to anticipate our needs, to be there for us, to serve and please us.

When we misunderstand that, when we guess what they want based on human ideas or what we read online, we often get it wrong. The truth is, what dogs want most — what makes them happiest — is to please us.

And sometimes, when they’re being “naughty”, it’s simply because they’ve misread our signals.

Take jumping up, for example. When we respond with “no” (speaking to them), push them away (touching them), and look at them (eye contact) — we’re actually giving them the three things they love most: our voice, our touch, and our attention.

So, from their point of view, we must love it when they jump up!

It’s a gentle reminder that understanding dogs isn’t about guessing what they feel — it’s about learning to see the world through their eyes. And that, perhaps, is one of the most loving things we can ever do.

—🩶 Written by Avril Munson, Clinical Dog Behaviourist🐾 thedogcalmer.com